Is It I, Lord?

 DEVOTION

THE GOSPEL ACCORDING TO MATTHEW

IS IT I, LORD?

Matt 26:20-25

20 When evening came, Jesus was reclining at the table with the Twelve. 21 And while they were eating, he said, "I tell you the truth, one of you will betray me."  22 They were very sad and began to say to him one after the other, "Surely not I, Lord?" 23 Jesus replied, "The one who has dipped his hand into the bowl with me will betray me. 24 The Son of Man will go just as it is written about him. But woe to that man who betrays the Son of Man! It would be better for him if he had not been born."  25 Then Judas, the one who would betray him, said, "Surely not I, Rabbi?" Jesus answered, "Yes, it is you."   

NIV

We can see this scene as many years ago we took part in a drama of this very event. It was interesting to be one of the twelve who asked that question, which is how the Greek appears. “Is it I? Lord. This translation views it as each of them saying, “surely not I Lord?” It might be more like we would say today, “I am not the one, am I, Lord? This Greek form carries the idea that each of them was not sure if they were the one or not. They did not have the confidence in themselves to not be a betrayer. It is also interesting that although Judas knew he had already betrayed Jesus, he asked him the same question. Was he trying to avoid a conflict, or a confrontation, pretending to be just as innocent as the rest? He was certainly a hypocrite, looking like he was one of them while already having separated himself from Jesus, harboring this evil act in his heart. John records this is when Satan entered Judas’s heart, Luke records it happened earlier, but the point is that Judas was being influenced by evil throughout his life as we know he always helped himself to the money in the purse. His character was not filled with light, but with darkness. Maybe they might have been times when he was not so filled with this darkness. We are not sure when it became overpowering in his life. He would have been one of twelve that went out with the authority of Jesus to heal the sick, and even drive out demons. But we know his act of betrayal was influenced by Satan. This act of betrayal, this being hypocritical is all about self-centeredness. Judas was about Judas and truly not about Jesus. The others were terrified at the thought they could be the ones who would betray Jesus, but not Judas, he simply lied, acted like the others, but Jesus knew, which made his lie even more hideous, his deception was clear to Jesus and yet he did not condemn Judas, although he did make it clear it was a woe event, saying it would have been better that Judas had not even been born. Jesus knew how this act of betrayal was going to affect Judas after it was acted out. The guilt and shame were going to drive Judas so mad that he would take his own life. This provides us with a great lesson. We know that when we sin it is in some form of betraying what Jesus did for us. Surely, we are not rejecting Jesus or turning our back on him, we simply cannot help but sin, it is our humanness. If we say we have no sin, w call God a liar, and that is not the case, but we do not need to feel that guilt and shame when we fail to be absolutely sinless, for we confess our sin and he is faithful and just to forgive us and cleanse us from all unrighteousness. We do not hang onto our sin as Judas did. We are sure had after Judas had betrayed Jesus, getting him arrested by the chief priests, if he had asked Jesus to forgive him, it would have been done, just as Jesus asked the Father to forgive them for not knowing what they are doing. Jesus is always ready to forgive, and Judas could have had forgiveness, but he allowed his guilt and shame to overpower his heart. We cannot live like that, no, we seek forgiveness and go on, maybe with a slight bit of terror that we could be one who would betray Jesus. It might be good to always be aware and ask, Is it me Lord?