Marriage

DEVOTION

THE 1^ST LETTER OF PETER

MARRIAGE

1 Peter 3:1-7

3:1 Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, 2 when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. 3 Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. 4 Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. 5 For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to make themselves beautiful. They were submissive to their own husbands, 6 like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.

7 Husbands, in the same way be considerate as you live with your wives, and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life, so that nothing will hinder your prayers.

NIV

We have arrived at a most difficult passage in which marital relationships are dealt with. We understand the context of the parallel passage in Paul’s letter to the Ephesians in which he is comparing the relationship of a husband and wife to Christ and the Church, and that relationship of Christ and the Church being the central theme of his words. However, Peter does not make that comparison, in fact, he says nothing at all about the church, or Christ and the Church. He is specifically speaking to the character difference between a worldly and a Godly woman and how it might be possible for a woman who is saved to live in such a manner that it brings her husband to salvation. Peter does not say that it is the normal relationship that a born again wife is married to a husband that is not born again. What he is saying is that if that is the case, the wife should live as a subordinate to her husband. This goes against everything that has evolved in, at least, our country. Women have fought for equality and have come a long way as many women have very powerful positions in the corporate and political arenas. There may still exist some inequalities, such as the pay scale in some cases.   We are not being judgmental, however, when we consider what we have observed within some marital relationships, we have even seen the husband given over all authority to his wife. The man has relinquished his position as the head of the house. What Peter is saying here in the relationship in marriage simply has been forgotten or dismissed as not for today.  Again, without judgment, but simply from observation, all we have to see is the multi-billion dollar industry focused solely on the outer adornment of women. We have also observed many women spend most of their adornment preparations not for the purpose to attract men or for their husbands' benefit, but to either impress or compete with other women. Peter is not speaking about any of these modern modes of conduct in our marriages. What are we to do with this truth in the face of our modern culture that seems to have gone so far from what God would desire in the marital relationship? First, it would seem the major or sole responsibility falls on the shoulder of the husband. Have husbands failed to live up to the charge God gave them? It is absolutely scriptural that a wise man should accept the counsel of his wife. It is absolutely scriptural a husband and wife should be partners in life. It is not that God sees women as less valuable than men. We only have to see how Jesus treated women to see the equality of all mankind. We have often said that God created man and woman as equal, but with different roles. We have also often said that God made a woman from man, by taking a rib from man’s side. He did not take a bone from his head putting the woman in charge of man, nor a bone from his foot, putting the woman at the feet of man, but from his side, so to have man and woman walk side by side through life. Peter, is making the point that a woman’s beauty comes from within her and that if her husband has not yet accepted Jesus, that by her living under the authority of her husband, showing him the proper respect he is due as the head of the house, he will see her true beauty is because of her life in Christ. It may be difficult for believing wives to submit to non-believing husbands in our society and the current cultural environment, but the question still remains as to how does the truth applies here today. We also have to see the heavy accountability God has placed on the husband and how we are to see our wives, respecting them. Leading is not done with a heavy hand, but with love, a tender hand, serving their wives, as Christ served the church. We all may have gotten all this mixed up, and need a restart, a reset, to get back to how God desires our relationships to live out. Are we living our marriages out as God desires? That is a question we each must answer for ourselves.