Search My Heart

DEVOTION

THE BOOK OF ACTS

SEARCH MY HEART

Acts 1:18-20

18(With the reward he got for his wickedness, Judas bought a field; there he fell headlong, his body burst open and all his intestines spilled out. 19 Everyone in Jerusalem heard about this, so they called that field in their language Akeldama, that is, Field of Blood.) 20 "For," said Peter, "it is written in the book of Psalms, "'May his place be deserted; Let there be no one to dwell in it,' and, "'May another take his place of leadership.'  

NIV

Some would say it is a fitting end to Judas for betraying the Lord, but is it really? It is true that God knew all along the plan he had for the method by which he would redeem mankind, his creation. It is true that God knew he would send his Son to die on a cross to take away the sins all mankind. Jesus knew from the very beginning that someone would betray him in that sense so that he would be arrested and crucified, as he had said to the twelve that one of you is a devil. Yet here we see the end of Judas, the horrible result of the inner struggle of a man that seemed to love Jesus, but was filled with turmoil. Was it just about the thirty pieces of silver, was it all about greed? Whatever it was Judas killed himself after what he had done. It was not too late for him to go to Jesus and ask to be forgiven, but he did not. He allowed his sin to overtake him, to destroy him. After he made his deal with the Pharisees and took the silver, did the act of betrayal, he returned to the Pharisees filled with remorse and threw the money at them, but he did not return to Jesus asking to be forgiven. Unconfessed sin is a killer, it will destroy a person from within, and it will cause them to burst open from the inside out. Jesus would certainly have forgiven him; in fact, Jesus would have shown him mercy, compassion and love. But Judas elected to allow his sin to destroy him. We cannot allow our sin to destroy us in that manner, we must always be willing to go to Jesus and confess our sin. If we confess our sin he is faithful and just to forgive us of all our sin. We can have a clear conscience and confidence to enter into his presence without fear of condemnation. There is no sin too great for God to forgive us of. But if we hang onto this sin, if we try to hide it from God, and worse from ourselves, it will destroy us. Keeping unconfessed sin within will cause us to dwell in a field of blood, a parched place, a desert, where no one can live. We need to always be on guard against unconfessed sin, even to the point of asking God to search our hearts and see if there is any sin within. Then we need to be open to what he shows us, and admit it is there, so that we can truly ask to be forgiven. If we are not willing to be shown, or refuse to admit that we actually sin, we are on the way to personal destruction. Search my heart oh Lord!