True Self

DEVOTION

THE GOSPEL OF JOHN

TRUE SELF

John 18:15-18

15 Simon Peter and another disciple were following Jesus. Because this disciple was known to the high priest, he went with Jesus into the high priest's courtyard, 16 but Peter had to wait outside at the door. The other disciple, who was known to the high priest, came back, spoke to the girl on duty there and brought Peter in. 17 "You are not one of his disciples, are you?" the girl at the door asked Peter. He replied, "I am not." 18 It was cold, and the servants and officials stood around a fire they had made to keep warm. Peter also was standing with them, warming himself.

NIV

We all know the other disciple known to the high priest was John the one who wrote this gospel account, but because of his humility he does not mention himself by name. But the central theme of this portion of the account is of course Peter and his response to questions about being a disciple of Jesus. Why was Peter questioned and not the other disciple? Was all this just to fulfill what Jesus had told him about denying him three times before morning? Or was this to prove to Peter his true self?  What was Peter afraid of? Had he not told Jesus even if he had to die he would never disown him and now in response to a girl he does just that. We do not know the age of this girl, but we do know she was not a woman yet, so a young girl, even what adults might consider a child asked if he was one of his disciples. What if she wanted to become a disciple, a follower of Jesus? This brash, outspoken, draw the sword kind of guy could not bring himself to tell this girl, why yes I am. How bold would we be in situations where we thought we might be threatened because we are Christians? Perhaps we do not actually deny being a believer but do we just stay silent? Certainly we are not afraid of being thought foolish because we believe. Maybe we do not think we know enough scripture to debate the truth. Some of us surely are not like Peter, we speak up whenever the occasion arises not caring what people think about us, as long as they know we are believers, followers of Jesus, his disciples. We have learned our lesson well from this account of Peter and simple refuse to be backward in declaring our devotion to Jesus, even to the point of death. Surely believers all over the world have done just that, and we would do no less, at least that is what we want to believe about ourselves. But unless we are in a threatening situation we may not actually know our true self. But what was threatening about a little girl asking him if he were one of his disciples? We may never know, but the truth is that we need to make sure we never back down from anyone if we are asked that question, no matter what may happen to us. We need to be sure we know our true self is in Christ.